PUT MOM INTO TIME OUT (cont'd)

First of all, don’t try this at home. Sure, you can grab the latest
movie and some microwave popcorn and head for the TV/DVD combo in your
bedroom, securing the door behind you. But I guarantee you won’t even be through the opening credits before you will hear your husband off in the distance, making a major mothering mistake.

Whip open the door. "No, Babe; the red shirt does NOT go with the pink
pants. Plus, Joey needs to wear a heavier jacket if you’re taking them
outside." Close the door firmly, locking it.

You just sprung Pandora’s box, of course. Before you have a chance to
settle back down with your movie, little fingers are wiggling under the door, punctuated by heavy toddler breathing and faint "whatcha doings".

Get out of the house!

What to do? It’s a big world out there; choose anything unrelated to
kids or housework. That means no errand running, appointment keeping, or grocery shopping. Don’t go anywhere near a MD, IGA, CPA or Toys R Us. Instead, allow your imagination to whisk you away to your favorite grown-up play zone.

Spend some time with your girlfriends, especially those without
children. Take an evening college course that challenges you, or an easy hands-on workshop that sparks your creativity. In the mood for a movie? Buy a ticket to a film you have been dying to see, preferably one without animated characters. Go to a favorite restaurant and order something slathered with onions, green peppers, hot sauce, or anything else your kids think is disgusting. Swim in the deep end; rollerblade minus the antiseptic and Band-Aids; hike without anyone complaining about bugs. Hop in the front seat of the roller coaster and scream all the way down the chutes.

Are you in a shopping mood? Hey, I may not have much money, but I still
like to look. And if I do happen to have a few extra dollars in my pocket, it’s nice to try on outfits without my kids either draped over my feet, peeking under the changing stall, or somersaulting down the next aisle.

Short on cash? Roll the minivan windows down, and go for a stress-free
drive in the fresh-scented country, with a soft drink you don’t have to share in your hand. Visit a bookstore or library sometime other than Story Hour; find a chair and read without interruption. Go to a park; sit by a lake; absorb the tranquility. Heal.

Feeling refreshed? Great! Now you can head back home and truly enjoy
your family. You will, you know. It’s amazing; having some quality time away really does make the heart grow fonder. Give yourself a chance to
release some pent-up tension, and you’ll marvel at how lots of those things that were irritating you about your children are actually kinda cute.

HOMEBODIES HINT: Talk with your spouse about building a guilt-free
break into each week. Brainstorm some activities you would like to pursue, call your friends, and mark two months of "Mom’s Night Out" dates on the
calendar.

*****

Excerpted from Cheryl’s book, "Stay-at-Home Handbook: Advice on
Parenting, Finances, Career, Surviving Each Day and More" (InterVarsity Press, 2002), available online or from your favorite bookstore. Comments? Write Cheryl at homebodies@comcast.net.

Cheryl Gochnauer is the author of "So You Want to Be a Stay-at-Home Mom" and "Stay-at-Home Handbook", both of which are available in libraries, bookstores and online. You can contact her at homebodies@comcast.net.